I stopped in for a Sunday visit to my favorite living 'rent. Thankfully, Mom was in a lovely mood this afternoon, and we had a great visit. Quod, Haden, and Dylan were there when I arrived, and we sat in the garden snacking on popcorn and ice cream. Yum!
I hope Levelle has a way of reading the blog while she's downy oshun. She'll get a kick out of this. On Friday, there was a 7 p.m. Mass at St. Mary's cemetery. We thought this was the dedication of the columbarium, but this might not be the case. But that's another topic. Levelle had arranged with Mom to pick her up at 6:30 to take her to the cemetery. She and her family arrived at 6:15 and found Mom waiting at the door. Mom was P.O.ed, got in Levelle's van and said, "Don't even speak to me!" Poor Levelle was clueless but took it in stride.
Today, I figured out the problem based on what Mom told me and what I learned from Alex, the concierge at BG. This coming Saturday evening, the 23rd, Mom is invited to a birthday party for Mr. Green (from Rosebank). Paula Green must have had someone (one of her boys?) call Mom and offer to pick her up at 5:00 on the 23rd to take her to the party. Mom apparently thought the party and the Mass were the same evening. By 5 p.m. she was waiting at the door of BG to be picked up for the party. The longer she waited, the more she got annoyed (really annoyed) because she now wouldn't be able to go to the party before the Mass, and she was NOT going to miss the Mass. So she had an hour and 15 minutes to stew before Levelle arrived. The concierge (Alex) at BG didn't know what was going on and couldn't convince Mom that she might not be going anywhere, because she didn't imagine there was a Friday night Mass anywhere.
And the moral of the story is... hare today, and goon tomorrow. No, that's a different story.
From now on, Alex and Linda at BG said that it would be extremely helpful (where Mom's concerned) if we gave them a heads-up when we were picking Mom up for some event. Just call the consierge-on-duty early in the day, and they'll be ready to explain to Mom if she happens to be waiting in vain. Keep in mind, there is a shift change at 4 or 4:30 pm, so call the desk after that, if you're picking Mom up in the evening.
The disturbing tidbit I referred to is this... When I first popped my head into the BG office, I asked Linda if she was aware of how things might be going for Mom and her adjustment period. Linda pointed out she wasn't the best person to talk to, as it is her job to get residents in to BG, not follow up with them. (This, of course I knew, but I was just asking, as no one else was available.) Linda did, however, say something about Mom being right on the edge between 'Assisted Living' and 'Reminiscence.' This isn't good news, and I think we need to have whatever care planning meeting we need to have with the BG folks. (And by 'we' I mean at least Quinn.) Mom still thinks she could be living at home. I don't know how, but we've got to do something to help Mom that would keep her in a regular room for as long as possible.
Got any ideas?
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Outsprinkles
These are the people whose love and support get us through each day and who we owe so much. They also helped a little producing......
Almost all of the Offsprinkles
2 comments:
My thought/hope all along has been that our first concern was for Mom's safety, then her physical health, and then her happiness.
She is safe at BG now, assuming she doesn't walk out and in to Charles Street. I think that she has been eating ( and deep down she likes certain parts of her new life, most notably the lack of cooking).
So if she puts on weight and lets go of the dream of repatriation to Yarmouth, maybe her day-to-day performance can improve.
This must be the hardest time for someone with AA. She will not like being taken to the level of care that Michael described from his visit. Very sad and depressing to think about.
From the last thread :
quinn said...
I am going with my family for a visit to see mom tomorrow. I had planned on talking to her case manager to get an update and to arrange for weekly updates. Sorry, Megan- I don't think I can handle or would want a daily update, unless there is a problem. I am also going to ask Fr.Art to go see Mom or ask him to get Fr.Tewes to do it. I'll let you know how that goes.
August 16, 2008 2:14 PM
I've been interested in getting the priests involved for some time, hoping they could bring some peace to Mom. (I even thought about making the Legacy contribution contingent on getting a visit from St. Mary's padres.)
Let me know how your converstaion goes, Q.
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