I hate to sound like an alarmist but...
We have to keep in mind that Mom recently started (or is about to start) taking the antidepressant Zoloft. While we can be hopeful that this will eventually be a good thing, it will likely be a bad thing for a few weeks, maybe a very bad thing. Antidepressants are famous for making depression worse before it gets better, and we all know how Mom has had adverse reactions to almost every medication she's been put on, anyway.
I'm speaking from personal experience here. When I was diagnosed with fibromyalgia, my doctor put me on a low dose of an old-fashioned antidepressant (Nortriptyline) in order to regulate my sleeping patterns. I wasn't depressed before I started taking it, but spent the first month after starting it extremely depressed. And then there are Matt's two nephews who committed suicide soon after they started taking Zoloft or Prozac.
I don't know if this means we should be rethinking our current visiting habits in order to keep a closer eye on her, or what. But it might affect how she takes Danny's news.
Regarding Mom's birthday... Is the plan just to meet at BG again? I can bake a cake. Or did we want to take her out anywhere? Maybe she'd like a beer to wash down the Zoloft.
This is just something to consider
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Outsprinkles
These are the people whose love and support get us through each day and who we owe so much. They also helped a little producing......
Almost all of the Offsprinkles
9 comments:
I with Megan. Let's wait a few weeks to tell Mom about the house. I don't think this should postphone the plans for FSBO. (Mom won't hear about it from Mrs. Fallon, would she?)
Guess that doesn't help with Mom's complaints about BG and pleas for escape.
For a birthday celebration, I'd love to take mom out for lunch on Sunday.
I guess that the bigger issue is how Mom's likely depression should be managed. Is there anything that we or her firends or car-givers should do (or shouldn't do) to help her cope? What does her doc say? Maybe the alzheimers makes the anti-depressant work differently.
As for the house, I don't think in the long run it will affect her too much whether we tell her now, later or never. But it would be uncomfortable if one of her friends brought it up on a clear day.
I was with Mom at her doctor appt with Dr. Lavin when he examined her. I wasn't in the room while she was being examined, but I was there when he talked to her. He told her that the memory test that she took in October '06 and scored 30/30 (you remember...the one where she called Quinn twice telling her not to worry because she had passed with flying colors!) was now at 18/30 (she also took it in June and scored 22/30). He explained to her that it was the disease that was doing this...not her and not her children. He wanted her to stay at BGT. Her weight is up, so that was good. He was also trying to get her to move around more. He's afraid that she is becoming sedetary (sp?). It seems that she spent most of the time in there crying to him about wanting to go home. She even told him that her brother would be living with her. ;-) He told her that she needs to get up and about more and get more involved. He suggested the antidepressant then. It's a very low dose generic form of Zoloft. He's planning on seeing her in one month (March 23rd) and every month thereafter. I'm sure that the nurses at BGT know what to look for, but I'm with Megan, maybe we should add back in a visit or two during the week to check up on her.
She was not thrilled to hear any of what he had to say, but was resolved to do what was told. I don't think this is the best time to tell her about the house. We can still put it FSBO for a while to check the market. We can also use some other real estate agent other than an O'Conor...they do exist ;-) .
Love to all - see you Sunday - Levelle
PS are we celebrating her birthday this Sunday or next? Do we want to check and see what her siblings are doing?
I did talk to Carol Leonard this week, and I told her about Mom going on the antidepressant. I also told her that we had changed our visiting habits and why. She promised to let me know if sees anything in Mom that worries her.
Uncle Jim called me to ask if her siblings could take her out to lunch on the 5th. I told him that would be great. I'm sure her friends will try to do something for her, too.
As far as tomorrow goes, lunch will be fine. Are we talking kids,too? I will meet her early and make sure she gets to mass first. Then maybe we can do an earlyish lunch.
As far as the house goes... I don't think we should say anything about selling right now, however I do think we should ask Paul to tell her he got a really good job.
The benefits:
a) It may help her accept the idea that she can't move home.
b) Paul can retain his position of
being mom's favorite (a plus for both of them).
c) Maybe if he says it enough, Paul will believe he really can get a good job.
Just clearing some cobwebs out of my attic. Q
Yea!!! Mom turned 100 today! (ER free days). Let's take her out to celebrate both of her milestones tomorrow. Megan, I'm sorry if my vote comes too late to prevent any baking. But if the oven's already warm...:)
Ok... I'm going to take one step back from the brink. I'll hold off bringing up Yarmouth sale with Mom tomorrow. Right after a celebration, it'd strike as kind of cruel. Paul will be relieved when I call him here in a bit:).
For two reasons though, there's this line in my mind that I'm having trouble crossing about 'sell-withOUT-tell'. One is just on general principle. Unless Mom has told someone otherwise, she tells me that she trusts me to do what is right even if she doesn't agree with 'the plan'. The second reason is the potential of Mom hearing of it from other than her children. Though that possibility is remote, wouldn't that scenario be more devastating for her? The FSBO sign was made ready today... I might need a push to plant it in the yard. My original plan was to do it on the the way there tomorrow. That way, there'd be no turning back ;)
Quinn? Are sure that you don't want to take the day off and stay home tomorrow? I'll get her to Mass if you do.
Any way, kid's are always a bonus in my mind. It lets 'em know what to watch out for :).. And earlyish sounds fine to me.
Stay-in or ake-out? I vote take-out to make the day 'special'.
take out
Take-out is okay with me. I was waiting for a final decision before I started baking, anyway. I have to go to my office early tomorrow, so someone call me and let me know when you're getting to BG.
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